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High School
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“Having been unpopular in high school is not just cause for book publication.”
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“At my high-school reunion, I learned how to summarize my life.”
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“The one thing I would like to get across about my whole feeling regarding high school is how I was when I was fifteen. Gawky. Always a hem hanging down, or strap loose, or a pimple on my chin. I never knew what to do with my hair. I was a mess. And I still carry that fifteen-year-old girl around now. A piece of me still believes I'm the girl nobody dances with.”
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“You could write slop for Mr. Simpson, but if it were punctuated correctly, spelled properly, and used some basic literary devices, your grade was inevitably astronomical.”
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“He'd quit going to class reunions because at his twenty-fifth he couldn't recognize half the people there. It was like reminiscing with a bunch of strangers. Some looked so unlike their former selves that fingerprints or dental records would have been the only way to identify them.”
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“The American high school is a surrealistic institution. High school and real life coexist, side by side, like the simultaneously existing worlds in a Superman comic book. But high school is like real life thrown slightly out of whack. Everything is just enough askew that it's about impossible to do them both. It's like trying to pat your head and rub your stomach at the same time. You can hardly do real life and high school.”
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“... you should enjoy and appreciate your days in high school, because you will remember them the rest of your life. Like when you're in prison, or you're getting mugged at gunpoint, you can say to yourself, 'Well, at least I'm not in high school.'”
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“If you enjoyed high school, you were probably a psychopath or a cheerleader. Or possibly both.”
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“If it had taught them nothing else, twenty years of living past high school had taught them self-preservation. ... No one was going to risk putting his ego on the line; they would come prepared with dates, flattering clothes, and a well-rehearsed, carefully edited biography. They would all be kind to each other. High school was enough torture for one lifetime.”
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“High school and equality are forever incompatible.”
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“Today I discovered two kinds of people who go to high school: those who wear new clothes to show off on the first day, and those who wear their oldest clothes to show they think school is unimportant.”
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“Friends aren't any more important than breath or blood to a high school senior.”
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“... you know a person is having a severe personality crisis if you see a high school class ring on a finger beyond the first semester in college. Male or female. It's a big sign saying nothing has mattered to my life since senior year.”
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“We spend our whole lives recovering from high school.”
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“You write for the people in high school who ignored you. We all do it.”
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“You're leaving college now, and going out into real life. And you have to realize that real life is not like college. Real Life is actually a lot more like high school.”
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“I went to my 30th high school reunion, and I could tell who was gay and who was straight because the gay people were like, 'Sarah, you've been doing so much,' and the straight people were like, 'So, Sarah, what have you been doing?'”
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“My parents were graduation experts. ... After a ceremony, my parents usually had postgraduation production notes about how to 'tighten up' the event for next year. ... They were particularly fond of the one-hour graduation ceremony. In their minds, if managed correctly, any number of students could graduate from any type of institution in sixty minutes.”
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“... life is just high school all over again, only with bigger bills to pay.”
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“Reunions are always fraught with awkward tensions — the necessity to account for oneself; the attempt to find, through memories, an ember of the old emotions ...”
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“In high school, my desire for friendship far outweighed my talent for it.”
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“[On a high school visit by Destiny's Child:] Then they appeared, golden Glamazons resplendent in hot pants the size of a dryer sheet and gold stiletto boots. The kids in the front row, clearly on funkiness overload, had the walleyed look of the Today's Catch section of the supermarket.”
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“Teenage girls, please don't worry about being super popular in high school ... What I've noticed is that almost no one who was a big star in high school is also a big star later in life. For us overlooked kids, it's so wonderfully fair.”
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“High school sucks. People who say those were the best years of your life — those people are liars. ... Who wants the best years of their life to be in high school?”
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“Schools have a kind of power over their students that most American adults will never experience until they enter a hospital, or old age home, an institution, or a prison.”