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Insults
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“The charm of Ronald Reagan is not just that he kept telling us screwy things, it was that he believed them all. No wonder we trusted him, he never lied to us. ... His stubbornness, even defiance, in the face of facts ('stupid things,' he once called them in a memorable slip) was nothing short of splendid. ... This is the man who proved that ignorance is no handicap to the presidency.”
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“Calling George Bush shallow is like calling a dwarf short.”
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“What we have here, fellow citizens, is a crassly egocentric, raving twit.”
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“I have been attacked by Rush Limbaugh on the air, an experience somewhat akin to being gummed by a newt.”
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“[On journalists:] They are as disruptive a menace to the public body: as grating turds in the intestines are to the private body.”
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“[On journalists:] They are the scavengers of society who, possessing no guts of their own, tear out the guts of celebrities. They have the sycophantic, false enthusing gush of maiden aunts: who are accustomed to being trampled on doormats.”
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“... you may call a person vain, and they will smile; you may call them immoral, and they may even feel flattered — but call them narrow-minded and they have done with you.”
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“Using insult instead of argument is the sign of a small mind ...”
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“Zingers should glow with intelligence as well as drip with contempt.”
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“... if you go through life looking for insults, you may be comfortably assured of finding them.”
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“I am writing you because I have nothing to do; and I'm quitting here because I have nothing to tell you.”
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“Sir, you have just insulted a woman. This card has been chemically treated. Your penis will fall off in three days.”