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Edna Buchanan

  • A young city, Miami lacks the history, the roots, and the traditions of other major metropolitan areas. Everybody here is from someplace else.

  • Sex gets people killed, put in jail, beaten up, bankrupted, and disgraced, to say nothing of ruined — personally, politically, and professionally. Looking for sex can lead to misfortune, and if you get lucky and find it, it can leave you maimed, infected, or dead. Other than that, it's swell: the great American pastime. ... You probably won't see it on a bumper sticker, but sex kills.

  • Our system is not one of justice, but of law.

  • ... I always warn aspiring reporters to observe three basic rules: 1. Never trust an editor. 2. Never trust an editor. 3. Never trust an editor.

  • A very laid-back dog, he hates trouble, rolling his eyes and whining when the cats quarrel among themselves. If the chips were down and we were attacked by strangers, he would do the sensible thing — run for his life.

  • ... I have become a conscientious objector in the war between the sexes.

  • She is always optimistic and resourceful, a woman who, if cast ashore alone on a desert island, would build a house with a guest room.

  • Life is a death-defying experience.

  • Friends are the family we choose for ourselves.

  • In the criminal justice system you see the worst people on their best behavior, unlike the civil system, where the best people behave at their worst.

  • True friends are those who really know you but love you anyway.

  • You ought to try surviving one of my family reunions. It's like having a bowling alley in your brain.

  • Men give love because they want sex. Women give sex because they want love. That's the difference between men and women. Ever notice how when we talk about our love lives, it's always about a man? Singular. All most of us want is one good man. But when men talk, it's about women. Plural. They want as many as they can get.

  • Where I come from these days, anybody who isn't seeing a therapist needs to.

  • [On Miami:] ... in this city ... to many motorists a stop sign means time to reload.

  • It is the norm for Miami politicians, exposed, indicted, even convicted, to be overwhelmingly reelected by voters who are apparently brain dead or, in some cases, literally dead, as recent voter fraud investigations revealed.

  • Fear is like water. You need it. And it's good for you, as long as you have the right amount.

  • Love is so fragile and so often fatal. I am amazed when people are brave enough to risk it.

  • The past is an unsolved mystery and the truth a moving target.

  • If not for bad luck we'd have no luck at all.

  • Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.

  • Guns have no eyes, no friends. You never know if they'll protect your life or take it.

  • He knows how to tell people to go to hell in a way that makes them look forward to the trip.

  • Everybody seems normal, till you get to know them.

Edna Buchanan, U.S. journalist, writer