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Bette-Jane Raphael
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“Giving a man space is like giving a dog a computer: the chances are he will not use it wisely.”
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“One of the precious payoffs to being a daughter is that, as we get older, our mothers seem to get better and better. The lessons they sometimes had to drive home to us with brickbats suddenly make perfect sense. The advice that once seemed colossally and hopelessly outdated becomes recognizable as the wisdom we refused to see. And the person who might once have been looked upon as life's chief roadblock — the adversary we were put on this earth to overcome — stands revealed as none other than the friend and ally that, in truth, she always was.”
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“... when we live with our lovers, more is sometimes less. There's more of him, of course. But there's less of just about everything else: privacy, autonomy, and closet space.”
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“If I had to live with a man, did I have to ... get hooked on one who calls my three best friends 'Dopey,' 'Mopey,' and 'Ghastly'? ”
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“It's not that I can't accept criticism. I can accept it, just not with as good grace as I accept, say, jewelry.”
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“Then there are those mornings ... when we don't so much seem to be getting out of bed together as we do to be coming out of opposite corners.”
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“If the apartment has to be neat ... why can't he just tidy up himself instead of asking questions like 'What's the magazine doing on the couch?'”
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“How can he make plans for you to spend the weekend canoeing through river rapids, seemingly oblivious to the fact that your idea of strenuous activity is shopping for slacks?”
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“Sex isn't everything. While most marital experts today agree with this statement, most men don't. Generally, men agree that the only thing more important than sex is — not getting it.”
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“He believes that all women are programmed, in utero, to want to get married, and that they cry at birth because they noticed that the doctor who just delivered them is wearing a wedding ring.”
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“If we see a couple fighting in the street, or sitting resolutely silent in a restaurant, he invariably points them out to me as object lessons in what happens to people when they get married. If I point out to him that we, too, have been known to do battle in the street and sit like stones in a restaurant, he says, 'See, we don't have to get married.'”
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“The problem is that Peter's idea of private time is being with me, and my idea of private time is being with me.”
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“... leaving a New Year's Eve party at eleven o'clock to go somewhere else is tantamount to telling your host he has doggy breath.”
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“Honesty is probably as necessary to a successful relationship as having both partners' parents live in another state.”