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Livia Squires

  • I'm amazed at people who wake up by themselves. I have a friend who says, 'The sun wakes me up. I don't need an alarm.' I find that amazing. The only way the sun could wake me up is if it set me on fire.

    • Livia Squires
  • I went to college because they told me it was going to prepare me for the real world. Since when does the real world have spring break?

    • Livia Squires
  • Going out with a jerky guy is kind of like having a piece of food caught in your teeth. All your friends notice it before you do.

    • Livia Squires

Livia Squires, U.S. seismologist, comedian