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“I grew up in New Jersey in the '80s. That means one thing: Big hair. ... I had big hair, my boyfriends had big hair, we all had big hair. Our prom looked like the poodle division of the Westminster dog show.”
“To me, a massive coif went hand in hand with wild, spontaneous trips down the Shore, and like every teenage girl within 50 miles, I also knew that it made your butt look smaller.”
“... if your subject is an actor, he or she will also be shorter in person than they appear onscreen. This, also, you must keep to yourself. Even if you think you are giving their lack of height a positive spin, you aren't. 'You always seem larger than life in photos, but it's nice to see that in person you're just like us' might seem like a compliment, but what a star hears is 'You're stumpy, and you will lose jobs to taller people.'”
“[On New Jersey:] Unofficial slogan: 'Parts of it are nice.'”
“[On a high school visit by Destiny's Child:] Then they appeared, golden Glamazons resplendent in hot pants the size of a dryer sheet and gold stiletto boots. The kids in the front row, clearly on funkiness overload, had the walleyed look of the Today's Catch section of the supermarket.”
“My toothbrush is pink / Is this hard to remember / Your toothbrush is blue.”
“Is today the day / Garbage truck driving away / Try again next week.”
“Do you have the keys / Are you sure you have the keys / I'll call the super.”
“Sweater made of wool / Does not go in the laundry / Oh well, too late now.”
Jancee Dunn, U.S. journalist, writer