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Lois Greiman

  • There are two kinds of people in the world. Those who enjoy a nice salami and those who have no souls.

  • A wedding is no way to begin a marriage.

  • Women have to be in the mood for sex. Men have to be breathing.

  • Of course I believe in hell. I have three brothers.

  • What if there's no such thing as PMS and this is just my personality?

  • A guy's got to get a license to drive a Geo, but any doofus with a few good swimmers can be a father.

  • Sometimes we succeed because of our upbringing, sometimes we do so in spite of it.

  • Tact is for people with too much damned time on their hands.

  • A person without regrets is called a corpse.

  • False hope is better than no hope at all.

Lois Greiman, U.S. writer