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Gilda Radner

  • ... every time I got disappointed I'd remember the Roseannadanna philosophy that says that you shouldn't cry over split milk 'cause if you spill some milk and instead of cleaning it up you just walk over it and start crying, they're gonna put you on lithium.

    • Gilda Radner,
    • Roseanne Roseannadanna's "Hey, Get Back to Work!" Book ()
  • You cannot live in Los Angeles for any period of time without eventually trying to write a screenplay. It's like a flu bug that you catch ... Even the plumber has a screenplay in his truck.

  • What we put into every moment is all we have. You can drug yourself to death or you can smoke yourself to death or eat yourself to death, or you can do everything right and be healthy and then get hit by a car. Life is so great, such a neat thing, and yet all during it we have to face death, which can make you nuts and depressed.

  • I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn't itch.

  • [Emily Litella line:] Never mind.

  • [Roseanne Roseannadanna line:] It's always something.

  • I think dogs are the most amazing creatures; they give unconditional love. For me they are the role model for being alive.

  • I saw motherhood as the next logical step in my life; I refused to accept the infertility sentence that was handed out to me. I found it very difficult to literally make the decision to have a baby. When it comes to you, when it just happens easily, it is still the biggest gamble in the world. It is the glorious life force ... what's meant to be — but really to create a human being is a huge thing. It's huge and scary — it's an act of infinite optimism. Suddenly, when it's not going to be a natural event and it's put into your hands with experimental procedures and elective surgeries, the decision becomes an obsession. For me the issue became less whether I wanted a baby or not and more my inability to accept not being able to have one.

  • Show business is like riding a bicycle — when you fall off, the best thing to do is get up, brush yourself off and get back on again.

  • It is so hard for us little human beings to accept this deal that we get. It's really crazy, isn't it? We get to live, then we have to die. ... What spirit human beings have! It is a pretty cheesy deal — all the pleasures of life, and then death.

  • Comedy is very controlling — you are making people laugh. It is there in the phrase 'making people laugh.' You feel completely in control when you hear a wave of laughter coming back at you that you have caused.

  • The goal is to live a full, productive life even with all that ambiguity. No matter what happens, whether the cancer never flares up again or whether you die, the important thing is that the days that you have had you will have Lived.

  • While we have the gift of life, it seems to me the only tragedy is to allow part of us to die — whether it is our spirit, our creativity or our glorious uniqueness.

  • I can always be distracted by love, but eventually I get horny for my creativity.

  • I wanted a perfect ending ... Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle and end. ... my life ... is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. Delicious ambiguity ...

  • Humor is just truth, only faster!

    • Gilda Radner

Gilda Radner, U.S. comedian, actor

(1946 - 1989)

Full name: Gilda Susan Radner.