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Mary Pettibone Poole

"It's all right to drink like a fish -- if you drink what a fish drinks."

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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"Many people who imagine they are live wires are only shocking."

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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"Success is getting what you go after; happiness is liking it after you get it."

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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"A bore is a person not interested in you."

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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"Some people confuse having a lot of money with being worth a lot of money."

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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"Experience is what you get looking for something else."

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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"The next best thing to being clever is being able to quote some one who is."

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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"People who are always making allowances for themselves soon go bankrupt!"

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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"Charm is the ability to make others feel attractive."

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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"There are no old people nowadays: they are either 'wonderful for their age' or dead."

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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"Absence makes the heart grow fonder; presents make it grow even fonder."

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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"When we are prosperous, our friends know us; when we are poor, we know our friends."

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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"Trying to appear rich keeps many people poor!"

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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"People who think money can do anything may very well be suspected of doing anything for money."

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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"To repeat what others have said, requires education; to challenge it, requires brains."

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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"He who laughs, lasts!"

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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"Money will not bring happiness ... but it enables us to be unhappy very comfortably."

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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"It's not what a man stands for that counts: it's what he falls for!"

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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"Culture is what your butcher would have if he were a surgeon."

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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"Familiarity breeds ... "

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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"Tact is the ability to describe others as they see themselves."

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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"A woman's definition of a bore: a man in love with another woman."

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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"Alcohol is a good preservative for everything but brains."

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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"The most powerful force in the Universe is gossip."

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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"The other man's money is capital; getting it is labor."

Mary Pettibone Poole, A Glass Eye at a Keyhole (1938)

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Mary Pettibone Poole, U.S. writer
( - )

I’ve been unable to find birth and death dates for Poole, nor anything about her except for an unsubstantiated mention on Wikipedia that hallucinogens were responsible for some of the epigrams in her only known published book.